Still no baby at our house, which is both good and bad. Good in that I really can’t take any more time off work right this minute, as I have just gotten back after having missed four days. I told Hannah that this coming weekend would be most convenient for me, and she just laughed and said,”TODAY would be really convenient for ME!” I remember that feeling, though, of being pregnant forever, like this last few weeks is longer than the entire pregnancy.

I will keep everyone updated, but I might not be around a whole lot. I am playing catch-up at work, plus still really don’t feel GREAT (J. said it could take up to SIX WEEKS before I start feeling normal. Yikes) at this point. Mostly tired. The upside is that I now have an EXCUSE for wanting to be in bed by 9:00, right?

Ah, poor girl. The contractions have subsided, and when she went in to the doctor he said there has been no progress. Still at 1 cm. and her cervix isn’t effaced at all. He did strip the membranes again, and this time there was some bloody show, but all in all, nothing. She came home and cried a little bit, because she is SO uncomfortable and so ready for this baby to come out, but she napped a little while and seems in better spirits now.

So, we wait….

It is a lovely day here. In fact, it *might* be a lovely day to have a baby. Hannah has been restless and uncomfortable for several days, had some hard cramping and backaches over the weekend, and today is actually contracting. Nothing too close together yet, they are very scattered, but are definitly contractions. She has a doctor’s appointment this morning, so we will know then if she has dilated past 1 cm yet. I was joking with her this morning that it would be a very convenient time for Aubry to make an appearance, as I am already home from work from being ill. In fact, I talked to my doc this morning because I am on the mend, but not entirely well yet, and she said,”You should give it one more day before going back to work.” Again, how convenient!

Still, we all know that babies will come when they are ready, so we are all calm and not overly excited. Well-I am calm, anyway, at least at this point. She will come when it is time, and I am trusting the process. Keep Hannah in your thoughts today, and I will keep you posted.

Today is a good day to participate in Friday Fragments; thanks to Mrs.4444 for hosting!

***It has been a crazy week on all sorts of levels.  I went to my first Al-Anon meeting on Tuesday because I am tired of being in pain and crazy.  It was good, I think.  I cried through the whole thing.  It is in many ways just like AA, but with a totally different spin, and I am glad.  I am so freaking co-dependant that it isn’t funny, and even though I know what to do and am doing it (not protecting Steve from the consequences of his drinking/decisions is number one, followed very closely by detaching), it isn’t easy and I need support.  So this is a good thing but also hard.

***I have been fighting what I thought was a cold that had turned into bronchitis for, I don’t know, a week? Plus have had terrible diarrhea for at least that long (TMI? sorry!).  On Wednesday night I fell completely apart because I just didn’t feel well and there was all this emotional shit going on, and in the middle of the night I started coughing and couldn’t stop.  As in, cough until I threw up or wet my pants, or both, with just enough time in between spasms to catch my breath and do it all over again. Called my friend/doc J. and she talked to me for a long time and listened to my symptoms and heard me coughing and she said,”Oh, you have….pertussis. There are 8 adult cases in the county right now.”  Dr. Google concurs, and I am now on some pretty major drugs, none of which seem to be helping.  I can’t talk because my throat is swollen from all the coughing, although it doesn’t hurt-a plus.  What hurts is the REST of my body, and I am so tired I can’t see straight.

***Hannah is 38 weeks pregnant today.  Her OB appt was yesterday, and she is 1 cm dilated.  Her doc stripped her membranes and she has been spending a lot of time squatting and walking, hoping to help things along a little.  Doc is quick to induce, will only give her a week past her due date before he will induce, so obviously we are hoping to prevent that from having to happen.  I keep telling her, though, not this weekend, I am in no shape to be there, and couldn’t anyway being as sick as I am.  So next week would be much better for me.  I might not FEEL great by then, but shouldn’t be contagious anymore.  We’ll see if Aubry cooperates.

***This is the kind of friends I have, though.  On Wednesday when I fell apart (I really did, I felt so bad and I was so sad that I went to lay down on the bed and just couldn’t stop crying), Hannah called my friend Jacquie for me and she and her husband came over to see what they could do.  The short answer was nothing, but them being there to love me was enough.  Jaquie picked up the kids for me last night and brought frozen pizzas for them, and that was so helpful.  My other friend (doc) J called a little while ago to make sure I was still alive, at least, and I just feel so grateful to have these people in my life.

***There is a very narrow window of time in which I can rest, between coughing spells and the short amount of time the medicine keeps them paroxysms at bay, and that time is now.  Send up good thoughts that I make it through the weekend, because right this second I don’t feel like I will!

As many of you know, I am Kori’s daughter Hannah, and I would like to take the time to thank all of you, not only for the gifts, but also for your prayers and thoughts. I can’t even begin to express how happy I am to not only have people that love and care about me, but also Aubry and my mom. I know that while I can provide all of the love and support possible to Aubry, I also know, that I would not have been able to give her half of the wonderful gifts I got. From a diaper bag, and a Boppy, to her Moby carrier, to her Johnson’s bathtime set, none of these things would have been given or even thought of, if it had not been for the virtual baby shower, if the shower hadn’t been thrown, I wouldn’t have any of the necessary things to bring her home, ( and also stuff to help me later on). Once again, I appreciate it so very much, and I am so very grateful to know the wonderful people that care about my mom, also care about my daughter and I. Thank you all, once again not just for the gifts, but also for your prayers and thoughts, it has made me not only ready to bring her home, but to show her as she grows that there are always people that will love and care about her, no matter what. Thanks again to everyone. Love to everyone. (: Hannah.